I LOVE this response, Cristina. If I had to write a follow up or a part two (maybe I just will!), this is exactly the story I would write. Part of my getting stronger and more confident and less judgmental of myself, was recognizing that if I wanted to attract someone of my list caliber, I was going to need to BE someone of my list caliber.

And while I think I do line up well with my own list -- generally -- the problem was, all my little mistakes and flaws and trauma stuff were things I might see as deal breakers in other people. Learning to go easy and not judge other people meant I had to start with myself.

And wouldn't you know, once I started working hard on that, and seeing results, I started to not feel so desperate to be partnered again. We really can be our own first love. Accepting ourselves as unique and imperfect makes us terrific partners -- if we decide we even want that.